what you've never had
so why does it feel like a loss?
why does it feel
like life's nothing more
than a hand and a coin and yet another toss?
it's the semblance that makes its way
into my head
the semblance I hold and believe
when it crumbles and fades
at the drop of a hat
I sit with the wreckage and grieve
and I look to you, friend
to confirm I exist
that my life isn't just one elaborate dream
or lately a nightmare
I long for the day
where I wake and things are what they seem
